Week 9 MLS Picks – give me a goal

NY:  I’m mailing this week in.  I’m employing the coin-flip technique.  I don’t know how draw is going to factor in to this.  F*ck it, I just won’t pick a draw then.

DK: Isn’t that what we always do? Mail it in.  to make it simpler (cause of timing) I’m going to match up with your matches.

NY:  Chivas USA v Chicago Fire:  I guess home team is heads, road team is tails, so here goes:  Damn it, I don’t even have a quarter so I’m flipping a nickel, but anyway: Tails = Chicago wins.  I like this method.

DK: Even though Chicago sucks, so does Chivas.  It’s going to be sad that this game is close in any aspect, but Oduro is likely going to notch a goal in this one, it’s harder to tell what Chivas will do – but east conference teams always fail miserably on the west coast. 1-1 tie.

NY:  Toronto FC v DC United:  Flip #2:  Tails, again.  That makes sense.  TFC doesn’t seem to play as well in league play as they have in their inter, and intra, national tournaments.

DK: TFC still can’t buy a point, and DC is on a tear, DC 2-0.

NY:  Vancouver Whitecaps v San Jose Earthquakes:  Flippity Flippity #3:  Damn it, i dropped on the floor and rolled under my desk.  Re-do:  Tails, AGAIN!  Eh, San Jose HAS been playing well.  They scored 2 in beating Union Saturday, then come out mid-week and put a 5-spot on the board to get another 3 points.  Sure, why not another win?

DK: I don’t like this match up only because I’m clearly picking San Jose… they’re good, who the hell knew. 1-0

 NY:  LA Galaxy v New Jersey Pink Cows:  Flippity Floppity Floop #4:  Heads!  That means that this early war-of-attrition will be won by the home side!  Sure!  Why not?!?!?

DK: Weirdly, I dislike LA more than RBNY, and they’ve been doing much better than LA so far (only by one game).   I’ll go with a 2-2 tie.  Think NY could HANDle it?  No, it never gets old.

 NY:  Seattle Sounders v Philadelphia Union:  Dare I coin flip this?  Sure, it seems to be working so well… Heads!  This means that Union will take their second straight defeat.  I guess I can believe that.  That turf is weird, it’s an odd time (1:30pm local), and Freddy Montero might be too much for the Union to deal with.  If these picks are correct, I’m keeping this nickel and flipping it every week, but if these are wrong, I’m going to melt the damn thing down so it’s no longer a coin.  There’s a lot at stake for this coin, isn’t there?

DK: Yes we beat Seattle last year… Yes that field is atrocious.  Yes my retinas burn while watching games in Seattle.  No nothing good will come from this.  Last year’s team was vastly different than this year’s team, and sadly enough – only one of those variations included Stefani Miglioranzi.  The only upside to this weekend for me is seeing the Avengers movie after the game, I fully expect a loss of 2-1.  I hope to god though that something FINALLY f***ing clicks with this team….

Week 7 MLS Picks

Dan – 17 out of 30
Nick – 13 out of 30

DK: This week we’re going to incorporate a special guest pick set of our dear, beloved friend, Johnny “Vegas”.  Let’s see if he’s as sharp as we are.

Jh: As sharp as you guys? Judging by your season record you guys are as sharp as a ball peen hammer.

 

NY:  We basically use this weekly segment to post content to the blog, as well as make fun of the other teams in MLS anyway.

 

DK: TFC vs Chicago – Not much to be presented by these two teams. TFC gets their first points through a  0-0 tie.

 

JH: Toronto vs Chicago: when gambling a man must have rules.  Always double down on 11 in blackjack, Never bet on the hard ten in craps Ect.  First rule of MLS game picking, always go against Canadian teams. Chicago isn’t much better than Toronto but just picked up Chris Rolffe back from his two and a half year tour of Denmark. Expect him in the game day 18 and so give the fire a big boost upfront. Chi 2-0

 

NY:  Vancouver hosting Dallas makes hefty travel for the visitors.  FCD will travel just 600 miles less than Union will by going to L.A.  The difference is that Dallas has Brek Shea, and Union don’t have anyone that good.  Dallas triumphs in this one 2-0.

 

DK: Portland vs KC – I’m jumping on the bandwagon… well granted, if you asked me last year I would say that KC looks like a fantastic team anyway.  But they are undefeated right now.  They’re legitimately on fire and I don’t see them giving this up that easily, especially against a team such as Portland.  The one thing with this game is that it will be in their Jedi Wen stadium, and with a chainsaw buzzing at a more annoying level than vuvuzela, it will be a tough one for them.  KC 2-1

 

JH: Portland vs Kansas City: another gambling rule I live by, anytime the best team in the league plays the worst team in the western conference. Always go with the best. Sporting KC are a balanced scoring team with a nightmare back line. And they have a tendency to beat up on bad teams. And right now Portland is BAD. 3-0 Sporting.

 

NY:  Houston’s traveling circus hits Ohio this weekend, and the homeless Dynamo take on the Crew.  Columbus were unlucky to lose to Union last week, the only goal coming from a penalty kick.  They get to rebound against the team-whose-new-home-stadium-is-still-being-built Houston.  It’s always tough playing every game on the road to open the season, just ask KC.  But Houston managed to score a goal playing underwater (that match in Chicago that was stopped after 65 minutes due to rain).  Columbus couldn’t take advantage of a makeshift Union backline last week, and they won’t fare any better against the hobos of MLS.  I see it ending 2-1 Houston, because they’ve only played 4 matches so far this season so the uninjured players have fresh legs.

 

DK: DC vs NY – I would be picking NY in this game anyway – considering DC just tied against Montreal last night (a bright side in the dark world of philly sports which was last night), but Rafa Marquez is fined and suspended for his blatant disregard for the talent that is Shea Selinas.  So I’m saying NY wins so much more outstandingly than before, and expect them to go on a tear while their monkey is off their back.  NY 3-1

 

NY:  New York’s luck gets better and better.  They got rid of that nuisance Luke Rodgers and played better.  Now, the league gifted them a reprieve from that thug, Rafa Marquez.  New York takes this one 2-0, as DeRo’s dancing shoes will not be needed this week.

 

JH: Colorado vs LA: normally a match up of the last two champions would be prime time viewing but alas this year so far LA and the Rapids have been middling at best. But much like the early 2000 lakers I expect the fightin Donovan’s to start turning it on. 1-0 LA.

 

DK: Colorado vs LA has the makings of a decent skilled match… and then you realize that they’re not on top like they both usually are.  I still think it should be a great match to watch, but nothing much in it for either – 1-1 tie.

 

JH: San Jose vs Real Salt Lake: Two very evenly matched teams, A  San Jose win puts them at the top of the western table while a RSL win locks them firmly at the top. But without Shea Selinas I don’t think the earthquakes have enough firepower to keep RSL from shutting down Chris Wondolowski. Espindola grabs a goal and RSL steals one on the road 1-0.

 

NY:  Real Salt Lake visiting San Jose is a chance for RSL to get right back on the winning track.  There’s certainly no shame in them losing to KC at this point in the season, with Sporting having such a good run right now.  The intrigue comes from Real looking immediately below where they sit, atop the conference standings, to see the Earthquakes just 2 points behind, with a game-in-hand.  Don’t worry, no one thought San Jose would be in 2^nd place at any point of the year, either.  I pick RSL to put SJE in their place, 3-2

 

DK: Chivas verse Union.  Chivas being mine and Nick’s definitive “Loser each week, every week”, this will be the game that will test how well the Union as a team is this year.  Remember, Chivas snuck in 3 points against a stagnant RSL offense – a little more than what we as fans can predict the Union to do when those two face off – and beat Toronto and Portland.   Some factors to take into play – 1) East coast west coast travel… this is a 10:30 pm game – 7:30 pm PST.  Jetlag will be in effect.  2) Some scuttlebutt says the Califf did not travel, but we are more than happy with Gaddis in there as a replacement.  3) It’s Chivas.  A lot of factors, mostly team based, are in our way of a victory here, but I’m still putting it in that Chivas is complete shit.  Union win 1-0 off either a set piece or a lucky PK.

 

JH: Union vs Chivas: Have the union even scored a goal from actual game play? I think Novak’s plan is only score off set pieces and PKs. Defensively the Union are rock solid and MacMath is coming into his own. Novak’s perfect season carries on as no one scores. 0-0

 

NY:  Interesting pick, this match.  Chivas, though they have 9 points, are winless at home.  They’ve both played Portland at Jeld-Wen Stadium, where Union lost and Chivas won.  They’ve also both hosted Vancouver, where Union got a scoreless draw and Chivas lost 1-0.  The aforementioned travel effects, along with the fact that Chivas have not conceded more than a single goal in any match so far, would have me pegging this as a Union loss.  But The Goats, for some strange reason, don’t play well at Home Depot Center.  Maybe they lose footing in the body marks Landon Donovan leaves after he dives.  1-1 draw.

Week 6 picks – god we suck at this game.

We need advice

Dan – 13 out of 25
Nick – 12 out of 25

DK:  There’s a reason why we’re not in Vegas.
NY:  Damn right.  There are better sports books for soccer in Europe anyhow.

DK: Well here we are again.  I’m getting to these picks late as usual… I need to start slacking off work more often.
NY:  MORE often?!?!?  Is that possible?

 DK: Game of the week should be KC vs RSL.  5 and 0 versus 5 and 1.  Top of east verse west.  KC has only allowed 1 goal in 5 games, and RSL has only allowed 4 in 6 games.  RSL’s only loss so far came at the feet of Chivas, so consistency can be a question, but that was a couple weeks ago.  Neither team is going to take the other lightly, and this will probably see some decent amount of scoring chances from both teams.  This one can really go either way, but a tie is most certainly out of the question.  I’m going to go with KC over RSL 3-2.

NY:  In Seattle v Colorado, I’m going to take a one week break from my assertion that Seattle always wins at home.  I’ll say 2-2 draw for this one.

 DK:  2^nd pick is going to be Dallas over Montreal.  Hands down.  I don’t think I have to go into much detail as to why, even though Montreal can take you by surprise.  Dallas 2-0

NY:  New England v DC United ought to be an easy one for DC, with NE’s Shalrie Joseph suspended for the match.  I foresee much bad dancing from DeRo.  3-0 DC wins.

 DK: 3^rd pick is Toronto and Chivas.  Now that Toronto can focus on the MLS regular season, will they go back to their normal level of suck that we’re accustomed to seeing?  Not likely.  I’ll put my money on Toronto finally getting their first points against Chivas 1-0.

NY:  RBNY hosting San Jose is going to be ugly.  As if it isn’t bad enough for the ‘Quakes that they have to travel cross-country for this, they’re running into the We-Play-Much-Better-Without-Luke-Rodgers NY side.  Henry finds some way to net a couple more cheap goals and earn Player of the Week honors yet again.  4-1 RBNY win

 DK: 4^th pick is one of those gimmes that probably will slap me in the face.  LA versus Portland.  Bottom of the west coast (who knew that LA was at the bottom – supporters shield my ass).  Whatever has befallen the Galaxy, I’m certain good ole Bruce – I look like a Bond Villain – Arena will start lighting some fire under peoples asses so that the golden child of the MLS won’t go 1-5-0.  My suggestion, start with the money piled up to pay Donovan and Beckham.  LA over Portland 1-0.

NY:  Chicago v Houston is going to be a more competitive match than most this week. That’s because Brad Davis won’t be playing, leaving Houston with a midfielder shortage.  This wouldn’t be a problem for them if Peter Nowak was their coach, because he would just play some forwards out of position there.  That guy’s got the answer for everything (I wouldn’t have been able to say that line without laughing, which is where typed text works better).  2-1 Chicago Fire win.

 UNION PICK

DK:  This one never gets old – and by that, it means it does.  The only thing we do know is that there is one less midfielder to randomly pick who might even ride the bench, yet alone start.  Hopefully Torres gets a fast and full recovery.  Anyway – I would say that we get to see Garfan back in that ill-fated LB position, as Lopez is likely with his national team.  Other than that… Yea.  I don’t know either.  What I do know is that something was starting to click in that last match against Vancouver, but unfortunately it wasn’t shots.  Columbus isn’t that great either, and word on the interwebz has it that even Columbus fans don’t think this is going to be a stellar game, as both teams have went on the decline – don’t let Columbus’ 2 wins fool you, those were games they were supposed to win (Montreal, TFC).  What I think?  I think we’ll finally notch our first win.  The shots will pour forth as if the Bearfight Brigade converted into Jersey Shore wannabes.  Union 2-0.

NY:  Yes, Columbus and Philly are having similar seasons right now, but Union will only go as far as Freddy Adu takes them, which will not be good enough.  I just can’t see them scoring 2 goals right now without Torres involved.  I’m picking this to be a 1-1 draw.

Summary:
DK:  KC 3-2 RSL; Dallas 2-0 Montreal; Toronto 1-0 Chivas; LA 1-0 Portland; Union 2-0 Columbus
NY: Seattle 2-2 Colorado; NE 0-3 DC; NY 4-1 SJE; Chicago 2-1 Houston; Union 1-1 Columbus

Week 5 Picks

This is the weekly post where Dan and Nick square off to see whom can better predict the outcomes of 5 matches from the MLS slate.  The email happened as follows:

Montreal v Toronto;  Columbus v New York;  SKC v LA;  San Jose v Vancouver;  DC v Seattle;  RSL v Colorado;  Portland v Chivas 

DK: Not like I’ve been posting anything on the blog to begin with, but it’s still nice to not have to worry about a “pregame” post commenting about how we don’t have faith in the team (read: Management). 

NY:  Dan, just because Union don’t have a match doesn’t mean that you and I can’t poorly predict the outcomes of the rest of the MLS weekend slate.  Let’s begin, shall we?

I’ll take Union’s 2 biggest geographic rivals, New York and DC to start.  New York seems to have been buoyed by the fact that Luke Rodgers is not going to be able to return to the team due to visa problems.  He seems like a jackass.  New York, on the road, is going to continue their We-play-better-without-Luke run of form and defeat their hosts, Columbus, 3-1.

DK: I think NY IS better without Luke – seriously, I hate the guy… then again there aren’t many opposing strikers that I don’t hate.  But NY is traveling to Columbus, who doesn’t look too awfully shabby, but they’ve only played 3 games, and one was Toronto.  I’ll still give it to home field advantage and say that Columbus over takes NY, but 2-0.  That, or Henrey places the ball in the net a few times (note: I didn’t say kick).

 NY:  DC United looked scary-good last week, and they are hosting Seattle, which should dedicate this match to the memories of Kurt Cobain and Layne Staley, both of whom died on April 5, in 1994 and 2002, respectively.  Ok, so they won’t, but wouldn’t it be otherworldly awesome if Sounders donned a flannel-pattern kit for this match as a tribute?  Pearl Jam and Soundgarden as a postgame concert?  Might be the only way that DC would sell as many tickets as Seattle averages.  Be that as it may, this will be the game of the week, with DC winning 3-2.

 DK: 2^nd pick is the teams from states in the middle west that fall into a whole in the map. RSL vs Colorado.  RSL is at home, but they just recently played Montreal on Wednesday, and won only 1-0.  You’d think they’d notch a few more goals on that one, but you can’t complain about a team with a 4 win and 1 loss start (I wish I could talk about a team with that start).  This is early to call, but obvious as a possible playoff match preview and the current battle for top of the West.  Note: RSL has a 6 game unbeaten street against Colorado, and I think this will continue on to 7.  RSL over Colorado 2-1.

 NY:  Civil war!  The first MLS regular season meeting between Montreal and Toronto will be a snoozer.  TFC is still seeing visions of Herculez Gomez scoring goals creeping behind their centerbacks, and Montreal hasn’t found their MLS-level game yet.  However, they earn a draw, 1-1, based on home field advantage.

DK: I too think that Montreal and Toronto will be a tie.  It’s just how much of a level of bore and ‘potential’ do you want to witness for this match.  Leave it in Canada and let us not suffer a 0-0 game.

 NY:  Runner-up for match-of-the-week is Sporting Kansas City hosting LA Galaxy.  It’s the runner up because LA is not playing well right now, otherwise, it’s a 4-0-0 SKC hosting the defending MLS Cup Champions.  I see SKC winning this one 2-1, and staking early claim to the title of early frontrunner for this year’s title.  And, commence fanning the rumor flames that KC can exercise their contractual rights to Herc Gomez to bring him in on-loan once the Clausura is over, and he likely wins the title there, too.

 DK: Again we’re picking the same outcome.  SKC at home is similar to what LA was last year.  Not only that, SKC has momentum – and talent.  Right now LA only has piles of cash.  Even though I doubt Gomez will come back to play for KC at any point in time, in the near future KC will easily handle what LA brings and Kamara will notch 2 goals easy. 2-1 also.

NY:  And I need a relative gimmie, so I’ll close with Timbers hosting Chivas.  It’s well-documented through these posts what my opinion of Chivas is.  I know they didn’t follow orders 2 weeks back in beating RSL, but that was an aberration.  That idiot with the chainsaw will get to celebrate a home victory, and cut into that log a few times in doing so.  Portlandia 3-1.

 DK: Yes Portland’s at home, and that buffoon will likely have fun celebrating a few goals (seriously, what are you compensating for with that chainsaw) – but I don’t want him celebrating with that chainsaw.  I get the gimmick, I get the tradition, I just don’t like it.  And in that I’m saying that he won’t be celebrating and this will end in a 0-0 tie.  Don’t you like the way I make my picks?

 NY:  And in closing, with a bonus prediction, I’ll predict that Union don’t lose this weekend.  It might be the only thing I get right.

Summary: NY:  Columbus 1-3 New York,  DC 3-2 Seattle,  Montreal 1-1 Toronto,  SKC 2-1 LA,  Portland 3-1 Chivas USA

DK: Columbus 2-1 New York, RSL 2-1 Colorado, Montreal 0-0 Toronto, SKC 2-1 LA, Portland 0-0 Chivas USA

Week 4 picks – The downward Spiral Begins

Score – Dan 7, Nick 8

Wow we suck

 

DK: Well, last week was completely miserable… I didn’t get shit right.

NY: That’s because your luck has run out.  I’m in front on the scoreboard, the way it should be.

DK: Hopefully not run out enough to win the lottery tonight.

DK: Since I have to right my sinking ship, I’m going to pick LA vs New England.  New England squeaked one out last week at home, but now they have to play LA in LA.  We all know how that works out for east coast teams.  2-0 LA just because they’re LA

NY: DC v FCD:  Andy Najar is away on Honduran international duty, and Brek Shea is just back from US international duty.  I think DeRo nets one, and Dallas gets one.  I call a 1-1 draw, in a match that may have more people on the field than in the RFK Stadium stands.

DK: Chivas vs SKC.  Chivas did the unthinkable, unimaginable, the incredible… ok I didn’t watch the game whatsoever.  But they defeated RSL last week (much to the demise of our pick count) – one of the last teams you would think Chivas could defeat.  Well, if it isn’t broke, don’t fix it, and Chivas is not that good of a team, and SKC is that good of a team with many attacking options (I’m still scratching my head as to why RSL didn’t score though).  SKC will easily walk into LA and take a win from Chivas, and stay undefeated.  3-1

NY: Seattle v San Jose: Seattle wins at home.  I know San Jose defied my prediction last week, it won’t happen again this week.  Seattle at home 2-1

DK: This is the only time I’m going to pick RBNY.  Still surprised at their manhandling of Vancouver, but if they did that to Vancouver at home, they should easily take apart the expansion side of Montreal in that wasteland they call home (or Harrison).  New Jersey Pink Cows will get the win, while acting and looking like they are the top class of the league – when we all know they aren’t.  2-0

NY: Portland v RSL: Interesting contest, considering RSL losing last week, and having to go on the road in a difficult setting.  I will pick a 1-1 draw here, as well.

DK: Toronto vs Columbus – Toronto, all though they have been playing well at BMO field, is more concerned about Santos and the Champions League than MLS right now.  Columbus will come in and wipe the floor with TFC.  2-1

NY: Colorado v Chicago: A matchup of two teams that we’ve already seen play against Union.  I was more impressed with Colorado, plus they’re playing at home, so I give this one to the Rapids, 2-0.

UNION

DK: We have the team.  We have the players Nowak wants… now it’s just implementing the fuck out of it.  We also need to score that 2^nd goal.  If we don’t, all is for lost.  But I’m going to say this will come down to a 1-1 tie.  Le Toux, if he plays, won’t be spectacular (neither will be our team).

NY: Union need to take the attitude of Gabriel Gomez on themselves.  He’s fiery, determined, and skilled.  If the whole team plays the way he does, they will win.  I don’t expect them to, therefore, I see this ending 1-1, only because Vancouver will not have Eric Hassli.  If he was in the lineup, the ‘Caps would win this outright.

 Recap:

DK:
LA 2-0 New England
Chivas 1-3 SKC
NY 2-0 Montreal
Toronto 1-2 Columbus
Union 1-1 Vancouver

 NY:
DC 1-1 Dallas
Seattle 2-1 San Jose
Portland 1-1 RSL
Colorado 2-0 Chicago
Union 1-1 Vancouver

 

Stay tuned later for our match ‘pre’view

Week 3 Game Picks

 This is the weekly post were Nick and Dan morph into pathetic excuses for handicappers.  Enjoy!

NY:  Dan, since you have deferred picks to me this week, I’m going to take advantage and pluck all of the easy home winners.  Not drawers.  Winners. 

DK: Yea, I have a shit ton to do and have to catch a train in 30 minutes.  Thanks for picking the obvious ones… GFY (I’ll tell ya what that means later) 

NY:  Seattle v Houston.  Seattle just wins at home.  I’m convinced that Drew Carey put some magical contraption inside of the Space Needle and it causes lots of Seattlites to attend, and for opposing teams to not deal well with the field surface.  If only Union could plant a similar device somewhere under the Commodore Barry Bridge… Seattle 2, Houston 0.

 DK: My first pick for the week is New England vs Portland:  I have no faith in New England, but I don’t think Portland is a good travel East team (much like the entire eastern conference is full of terrible travel teams, period).  If you’re watching this, I’ll feel sorry for you, it’s probably bound to be a shitty game (although the weather really nice) – I pick a 0-0 tie.

 NY:  TFC v San Jose.  San Jose flat-out stinks (hoping no one returns fire for me being a Union fan…ok…coast is clear).  I know TFC is missing Torsten Frings.  I hate that guy anyway, as I still haven’t forgiven any German international who was part of that 2002 World Cup team that eliminated the U.S.  DAMN YOU OLIVER KAHN!!!!!!!!!!!  Oh, wait, yeah, um… TFC holds serve at home 1-0, because, again, San Jose stinks.

 DK: Vancouver vs DC: East can’t compete on the west.  Vancouver (and Le Toux) will continue success at home with a nice win.  3-1 Vancouver with De Ro notching their only goal, and Le Toux getting a goal and assist.

NY:  Columbus v Montreal:  Two directions that my opinion of Montreal Impact in MLS can go.  They played their home-opener last week in front of over 58,000 people and drew Chicago Fire 1-1.  This says that either a) Chicago is very capable of handling greatly adverse conditions therefore Union should be worried about them when they play at home (yikes!!!), or b) Montreal is not ready for MLS league play yet because they couldn’t even get a win in front of all of those screaming, French-Canadian lunatics.  I go with b) so Columbus wins at home 2-0.

DK: RBNY vs Colorado:  We all hate red bull.  Colorado didn’t show much promise against are decent, but mismatched union, but capitalized on our mistakes.  Expect mistakes to run rampant on NY side.  Colorado 1-0.

NY:  Real Salt Lake v Chivas USA:  Chivas = HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!  RSL ftw 4-1 (And that might be generous.  I was nice and gave Chivas a goal)

DK: Gimme pick of the week (year).  Chivas loses easily, 3-0 for RSL.

NY:  Chicago v Union:  As I alluded to in the Columbus/Montreal preview, the fact that Chicago went into Montreal and earned a draw in those conditions leads me to believe that they are playing plenty well enough to handle whatever lineup Nowak decides he will throw out there.  However, based on the chances Union created during their match against Colorado, I’m encouraged that they’re finding their good form.  However (again), they played a lot of that second half with Colorado’s Jeff Larentowicz red-carded.  Lest we forget, Union conceded a goal in that time before they scored one.  If you draw a team when you’re playing with one more player than they are, I can’t pick you to win against a full-strength side.  Plus, if I remember correctly, Toyota Park is a relatively-narrow pitch, and Union never deal with those very well.  Especially if Nowak plans on deploying is 3-5-2 again.  On THAT field, those 5 midfielders will be stretched from sideline-to-sideline and almost standing next to each other.  And then there’s this mess with Danny Califf…don’t even start…my head’s beginning to hurt… Chicago 1 Union 1.

 DK: I give 2 weeks until Califf gets traded due to the bullshit going on.  You never speak up against a coach, but you never speak up against a coach with an ego who expects you to already know what he’s thinking.  The asshat.  Anyway, I say experimentation in this weird lineup finds some success, but won’t overpower Chicago.  I go with a tie 2-2.  Now I have to catch a train.

Summary:

NY-Seattle W over Houston, Toronto W over San Jose, Columbus W over Montreal, Real Salt Lake W over Chivas, and Chicago draw Union (1-1)

DK-New England draw Portland, Vancouver W over DC, Colorado W over New York, Real Salt Lake W over Chivas, and Chicago draw Union (2-2)

Bonus prediction!!!!!!!!!!!  Dan has to catch a train, my guess is he catches that train, and because it’s SEPTA, catches something from said train.  No preditiction on what though.  We’re all probably better off not knowing.  Enjoy the games!

Season Picks – Week 2 Dan vs Nick

All went well for Dan minus his Union pick, as he went 4 for 4 prior to the Union loss.  Nick caught back up due to his union prediction.  Scores Dan 4 – Nick 3.  On to week 2!

 

WTF is Nowak doing

 

NY:  San Jose v Houston:  Lingering from last year’s playoff defeat of the Union, I still don’t like Houston.  I know they won a road match last week, but that was against Chivas.  There might not be a worse team in this league than Chivas.  Therefore, I will say that Wondo nets one for the ‘Quakes, and the match ends in a 1-1 draw.

DK: As I would normally pick this match and say Houston over San Jose, Houston not scoring a goal til the 92^nd minute against Chivas is going to make me walk away from this one.  Instead I’m going to pick Kansas City over New England.  I’m basing this on SKC holding strong and proving that they are and will be the top of the East (that counterattack is hard to stifle) and the New England is still rotting from the inside out in all areas of management, playing, and so forth.  2-0 for Sporting at home.

NY:  FC Dallas v Portland:  Lingering from last week’s defeat of the Union, I still don’t like Portland.  Dallas did well to frustrate PCNJ last week, but Portland isn’t a bunch of whiny, complaining quitters.  This being in Dallas, I think FCD takes this 2-1.

DK: I’m just going to say that I’m going to pick most all other league matches.  The ones you picked are likely going to be close ones.  I don’t think Portland can out match DC like the way they outplayed the Union, but it goes without saying that they are completely match fit and this will be a good match to watch.

My 2^nd match is going to be Montreal and Chicago.  Chicago had a bye in the opening week and will be well rested.  If you include the fact that their starting line is still intact from last year, they are already miles ahead of the Impact… but what amount of impact (see what I did there) will a ‘record breaking’ crowd for Montreal do for the home team?  I don’t think a bunch of French Canadian fans will make that much of a difference.  I’ll say Montreal will finally tally a goal, but lose 2-1 to Chicago.

NY:  Real Salt Lake v New York:  RSL dominated a tired LA Galaxy 3-1.  They might double that goal-scoring output against a team who seemed to only have 2 players who cared against Dallas.  Ok, maybe not quite THAT bad, but RSL wins again, either 2-0 or 3-1.

DK: 3^rd pick for me is Seattle verse Toronto.  Both played the 2^nd leg of the CONCACAF Champion’s league Quarterfinal Wednesday night. Seattle, being thoroughly embarrassed by Santos – Toronto overcoming the “goliath” in LA.  One’s confidence is likely shattered, the other is walking on air.  Both are going to have their fair amount of travel-lag and fatigue between Wed and Saturday.  I don’t think the home field advantage of plastic and fluorescent colors will help Seattle against the confidence TFC will have after beating LA at home.  2-1 TFC.

NY:  Chivas v Vancouver:  Chivas sucks.  Sebastien Le Toux will become Sebastien Le Two in this one, and all Union faithful will shed a tear into their green beer.

 

DK: Far too obvious.  Vancouver played solid soccer in their opener.  Can’t do anything but agree with you on this one.  The gimme pick of the week – Vancouver wins 2-0

NY: Union v Colorado:  Union found it tough to navigate the midfield against Portland, and they will be faced with Jeff Larentowicz and Pablo Mastroeni in the central midfield which won’t make things any easier.  I’m setting the yellow card over/under at 4.5.  That same over/under applies to number of times we will collectively nearly crap ourselves because a Colorado right winger gets behind Porfirio Lopez.  Unless something changes miraculously from Monday to Sunday, I see this as another loss for the U, at BEST a draw.  Second verse, same as the first, Union 1-2 Colorado.

DK: I’ll stop being a homer for once and I’m going to get flack for this as well.  There’s no possible way we’re going to play as a team.  We look like we’re in 2010 form, minus someone attempting to fly like superman (yes, I’m never going to give up on referencing David Myrie’s performance).  We have no midfield – literally they almost disappeared.  Our strikers were too far depressed into our defensive half, providing few outlets for any possible counterattack (which we never had).  And our defensive line looks surprisingly shaky – granted that after Portland’s tying goal we started to panic and play the long ball – something of which we again, never had – and opened ourselves up more for constant pressure did NOT help ourselves defensively.  Colorado is a tough team to beat, even with Casey Connor out for who knows how long.  2-0 Colorado.  The only thing that could save us is home field advantage, Colorado travel lag, and MacMath showing us the same performance he did in goal last year.  But all signs point to no win.

NY:
SJ vs Hou – Tie
FCD vs Por – FCD 2-1
RSL vs NY – RSL win
Chivas vs Van – Van win
UNION vs Colorado – loss

DK:
SKC vs NE – SKC 2-0
Mon vs Chi – Chi 2-1
Sea vs TFC – TFC 2-1
Chivas vs Van – Van 2-0
UNION vs Colorado – loss

Season Picks – Week 1 Nick vs Dan

In an effort to cure boredom, and lack of content on the blog, Nick and myself are going to pick a set of 5 games weekly.  Naturally, being a degenerate gambler, I had to make sure that something was in it for the victor.  So – the one dollar wager is on!

 

The rules are simple – 4 games a week are free to choose, and the 5th pick of the week will be that week’s Union game (if there is no Union game, we pick a different game).  Only the final outcome of the match will matter, not any predicted score.  So if we say Union win 5-1, but only win 1-0, the point is still ours.  Scores will only be used for a possible tie-breaker.  Whoever has the most points at the end of the season will have bragging rights – which won’t matter because Nick will still say (rightfully) he has more knowledge than I do.

PICK 1

 DK: Vancouver vs Montreal – Impact, what impact.   Montreal is new.  Vancouver has a team set, and with the prime addition of Le toux will likely come out on top in this match.  I don’t think Montreal is ready enough as a team, and won’t be so until mid season (prove me wrong).  Vancouver 2-0

NY:  Vancouver vs Montreal???  What is this, the National Hockey League?  Beat it with this two-teams-from-north-of-the-border nonsense.  This is the only game that I chose to look at different than yours.  I’m looking at RBNY @ FC Dallas.  This game is about the late-season charging Pink Cows against Brek Shea and company.  I see this one ending in a draw.  Henry will be in form after a surprisingly successful return run with Arsenal, and Brek Shea will want to produce for his club team before he gets shipped off to try to win his country a medal.

DK: I don’t need your damn hassle.

PICK 2

DK: DC vs KC – What can’t you say about KC?  They’re going to look to try to match and even top last season’s success – and they are road tested from last year (albeit to a fault).  It’s the season opener, and getting the first win on the road will set them apart from the rest of the eastern conference quickly – as that often became the downside for East coast teams (with the new format though, expect this to change).  Unless DC can get De Rosario to break out with multiple goals, KC is looking like the victor.  2-1 KC.

NY:  Sporting were very impressive once they actually got to play games in a consistent venue.  The question is: did KC benefit from playing at their comfy, new home, or did they benefit from the fact that no one in their right mind would enjoy visiting Kansas City?  I’m not sold either way.  The only problem is that DeRo is really the only bullet in the DC gun, which I expect to be shooting blanks in this first week.  SKC ftw.

PICK 3

DK: LA vs RSL – LA is coming off a CCL quarterfinal match on Wednesday, although being the number one team in the league – RSL is well rested and not one to take lightly.  LA will have the home crowd and the start of a new season behind them, but their minds may still be on the CCL.  I’ll predict RSL to take advantage of fresh legs and win 2-1

NY:  Galaxy did, indeed, already play this week, but I see this as a good thing.  I think it has put them in a rhythm, which I expect to carry over to this game.  It’s the beginning of the season, therefore I don’t see the heavy schedule running the players down too much.  It would be a big problem 2 months from now, but the team is fresh at present.  I expect LA to win this game, but probably just 1-0 because RSL is no slouch defensively.

PICK 4

DK: Chivas vs Houston – I took an easy pick, sue me.  Chivas can easily be described as a bottom feeder team.  Houston’s only fault may be under-estimating them at Chivas’  home.  Although, one can be a welcome mat for only so long – but I don’t expect things to change that drastically anytime soon.  Houston 2-0.

NY:  Shockingly, I’m going to agree with DK.  This also saddens me.  Any thought of Houston taking a team lightly during their season-opening match will be doused with the memory of Danny Califf netting the game’s only goal in 2011’s season-opening match.  I, also, think Houston will win 2-0.

UNION PICK
Portland vs Union

DK:  1-1 tie.  Portland gave Cooper to RBNY in the offseason, and Union lost a lot of franchise stars.  This will likely be an even matchup – even though the addition of attack minded players will help the Union, Nowak is obviously going to play a tight defensive strategy to counteract any plausible success.  Expect the inevitable confusion between players in the lineup.

NY:  I pick this as a loss for the U.  Too much change among the personnel responsible for scoring goals.  Freddy Adu is being depended on heavily for leadership, but he hasn’t played with this team long, and seemed, at times, to be at odds with teammates during matches.  He has had the training time with his team now, but I wonder if they can gel early enough to get a win in a venue with dreaded narrow pitch.  Such a field was their undoing in Houston’s Robertson Stadium, where they couldn’t find the space and couldn’t play the aerial game.  They were forced to pass vertically and deep, which lead to choppy possession and not enough goals.  Unfortunately, I expect more of the same in this one.  I ABSOLUTELY hope both myself and DK are wrong and Union win this match 5-0, but I’m very skeptical of the moves Nowak has made during this offseason and need to be shown by the team that they know how to win.

Summary:
DK
1: Vancouver over Montreal 2-0
2: KC over DC 2-1
3: RSL over LA 2-1
4: Houston over Chivas 2-0
Union : Tie

NY
Pick 1: RBNY / FCD Tie
Pick 2: KC over DC 2-0
Pick 3: LA over RSL 1-0
Pick 4: Houston over Chivas 2-0
Union: Loss